Overdue Update

OK, it’s been forever since I updated, and I’ve been putting it off and putting it off because I just can’t think of anything to write that isn’t the same old drudgery: moving woes, job stuff, etc. I feel like my journal is getting a little self-serving and boring… I’m tired of writing about the same old things over and over. The problem is I can’t think of anything else to write at the moment, so I’ll get about five sentences into a draft of an entry and then realize what I’m doing and delete it.

That being said, if I don’t update now I probably won’t for months, and I like this journal and want to keep it around if at all possible. I’ve had journals in the past that I stopped updating for a few weeks and then realized that to go back and update would be ridiculous, so I just left them hanging in cyberspace, and I don’t want that to happen to this one if I can help it. So, inane or not, I decided to post a little about how things are going down here in SC.

I’m still looking for a rental house for us to move into; we decided that a rental house would suit us a lot better than an apartment. I heartily agree – I’ve lived in apartments for almost ten years now and good lord I’m tired of being stuck in a human filing cabinet. It’ll be nice to have a house, rental or not, where we don’t have to worry about playing music too loud for the upstairs neighbors. Honestly, privacy is the main reason we’re looking for a house instead of an apartment, but there are other positives too: a possible lease-to-own deal, month to month leasing instead of a yearly contract (so if we find a house we want to buy we can move out without breaking an expensive lease), more space, etc. But mostly it’s that feeling of being stuck in with two hundred other people that I want to leave behind… I’m really sick of it.

I’ve found a couple of prospects that look ok, but there’s not much of a rental market in Greenville right now, so it might all be a moot point – we may have to move into an apartment anyway. I did find one that would be absolutely perfect, but it won’t be vacant until the first of October. *sigh* Oh well… I’m going to look at one of the prospects on Friday, and take a ton of pictures to send to Erin. This is something else that’s holding up the process: choosing a place for us to live for a long(ish) period of time with her being 600 miles away. I am trying to send her five million pictures of these places, but it’s still very difficult to make any decisions with her being in Indianapolis.

The job’s going well, I guess. I still haven’t been assigned any serious responsibilities. I’m helping everyone out with all the work they just can’t get done because they’re so damn busy, and to be honest, it’s getting a little old. I’ll be glad when I’m assigned my own territory, my own customers, my own job. The first few weeks is always supposed to be like that I guess, but I’ve been here for a month now, and I’m tired of cutting my teeth on other people’s stuff.

It’s been strange living here without anyone besides my family – Jo and I got together one weekend, but he’s moved up to PA now and I don’t know when I’ll see him again. I went back to the game last weekend just so I could be around other people. I never realized how much of a social creature I am until I was forced to spend a month by myself. I even went to my ex-wife’s house the other day to see her and hang out with her for a while. We’ve gotten back to being friends since we haven’t been together in almost nine years, but it was still kind of strange. I’ll just be glad when we get everything together and get our lives going again. All this waiting is making me crazy. Erin should be down here the weekend of the 17th, as her school starts on the 20th, so I just have to make it two more weeks… I can do that. As for all our stuff moving down, we’re doing that the weekend of Labor Day, so that’s a little longer to go… I don’t like to think about another month in limbo, but Erin will be here halfway through that, so it won’t be so bad.

Hmmm… what else? I finished the seventh Harry Potter book. It was REALLY good. Well worth the wait. I can’t wait to see what they do with the sixth and seventh movies. Since I have friends that read this journal and the HP books, I won’t reveal any spoilers here. But suffice it to say, it’s a good read. If you are reading this and haven’t read the HP books, and you enjoy reading, I recommend them. They’re just as entertaining for adults as they are for kids. And that’s all the plugs I’m doing for those books (in this entry, at least).

I’m going to Florence this weekend to see my buddies. Hopefully it’ll help me get rid of some of this loneliness that’s been wrapping itself around me like an invisible cloak. Sounds melodramatic, right? But more and more I’ve been realizing that this is exactly what it’s like. Most of the time I don’t even realize that it’s there, but it always is. I’m just lonely for friends, lonely for Erin. My family’s great, but they don’t know me like she does. I feel like a guest, and that gets old after a while. It’s nothing that they do, it’s just something I impose on myself. It’ll be great to get back into a home after this. On the positive side, this time really is making me see how much I value the things I have – a great home, a woman that I love, etc. I’m anxious to get back to those things.

~Becky